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Another joke



 
 
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  #1  
Old April 12th 08, 08:17 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Simon
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Posts: 25
Default Another joke

A dustbin man knocks on the door of a house and after a while a
Japanese chap with big bottle bottom glasses answers.

Jap: 'Harwo'

DM: 'Where's your bin?'

Jap: 'I bin toilet'

DM: 'No. Where's your dustbin?'

Jap: 'I just bin toilet'

DM: 'No. No. Where's your wheelie bin?'

Jap: 'Okay. Okay! I weally bin to toilet to have a wank.'

  #2  
Old April 12th 08, 10:22 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Simon
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Posts: 25
Default Another joke

On Sat, 12 Apr 2008 22:10:03 +0100, "Janitor of Lunacy"
wrote:


"Simon" wrote in message
.. .
A dustbin man knocks on the door of a house and after a while a
Japanese chap with big bottle bottom glasses answers.


Is it half-term already?


Miserable sod.

  #3  
Old April 14th 08, 07:26 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Cynic
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Posts: 55
Default Another joke

On Sat, 12 Apr 2008 20:17:10 +0100, Simon wrote:

A dustbin man knocks on the door of a house and after a while a
Japanese chap with big bottle bottom glasses answers.

Jap: 'Harwo'

DM: 'Where's your bin?'

Jap: 'I bin toilet'

DM: 'No. Where's your dustbin?'

Jap: 'I just bin toilet'

DM: 'No. No. Where's your wheelie bin?'

Jap: 'Okay. Okay! I weally bin to toilet to have a wank.'


The MO tasked a new officer with getting some basic medical history
from his soldiers. On the parade square, the officer started with the
first question on his list. Calling the first soldier forward, the
following exchange took place:

"Private Smith, are you regular?"

"No sir, I'm a territorial sir."

"No, no, no - Did you 'go' this morning?"

"Oh no sir, I 'aven't got a pass sir."

"No private - I'm wanting to know the condition of your bowels!"

"I weren't issued wiv none of them, sir"

"You stupid man - are you constipated?"

"No sir, I'm a volunteer sir."

"You ignorant fool - don't you understand the Queen's English?"

"Oh! Is she really sir?"

"Bloody hell man - what I need to know is have you had a ****?"

"Well actually I didn't like to say sir, but I thought it was you
sir."

--
Cynic

  #4  
Old April 14th 08, 08:24 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Flop
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 94
Default Another joke

Cynic wrote:

The MO tasked a new officer with getting some basic medical history
from his soldiers. On the parade square, the officer started with the
first question on his list. Calling the first soldier forward, the
following exchange took place:

"Private Smith, are you regular?"

"No sir, I'm a territorial sir."

"No, no, no - Did you 'go' this morning?"

"Oh no sir, I 'aven't got a pass sir."

"No private - I'm wanting to know the condition of your bowels!"

"I weren't issued wiv none of them, sir"

"You stupid man - are you constipated?"

"No sir, I'm a volunteer sir."

"You ignorant fool - don't you understand the Queen's English?"

"Oh! Is she really sir?"

"Bloody hell man - what I need to know is have you had a ****?"

"Well actually I didn't like to say sir, but I thought it was you
sir."


Harry came in from playing with his friends in the garden.
"Jimmy wants to know -what is it called when someone sleeps on top of
someone else?"
Gran, who is cooking, coolly replies "It is called sexual intercourse"
Harry goes out satisfied and Gran is pleased with her sang froide.
Half an hour later, Harry comes back in.
"Jimmy's mother says the phrase is 'bunk beds' - and she wants a word
with you"

Flop
  #5  
Old April 14th 08, 08:24 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Flop
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 94
Default Another joke

Cynic wrote:

The MO tasked a new officer with getting some basic medical history
from his soldiers. On the parade square, the officer started with the
first question on his list. Calling the first soldier forward, the
following exchange took place:

"Private Smith, are you regular?"

"No sir, I'm a territorial sir."

"No, no, no - Did you 'go' this morning?"

"Oh no sir, I 'aven't got a pass sir."

"No private - I'm wanting to know the condition of your bowels!"

"I weren't issued wiv none of them, sir"

"You stupid man - are you constipated?"

"No sir, I'm a volunteer sir."

"You ignorant fool - don't you understand the Queen's English?"

"Oh! Is she really sir?"

"Bloody hell man - what I need to know is have you had a ****?"

"Well actually I didn't like to say sir, but I thought it was you
sir."


Harry came in from playing with his friends in the garden.
"Jimmy wants to know -what is it called when someone sleeps on top of
someone else?"
Gran, who is cooking, coolly replies "It is called sexual intercourse"
Harry goes out satisfied and Gran is pleased with her sang froide.
Half an hour later, Harry comes back in.
"Jimmy's mother says the phrase is 'bunk beds' - and she wants a word
with you"

Flop
  #6  
Old April 14th 08, 08:25 PM posted to uk.media.tv.misc,uk.food+drink.chinese,uk.culture.arts.writing,uk.business.agriculture,uk.rec.cars.maintenance,uk.telecom.broadband,uk.radio.amateur,uk.legal
Flop
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 94
Default Another joke

Cynic wrote:

The MO tasked a new officer with getting some basic medical history
from his soldiers. On the parade square, the officer started with the
first question on his list. Calling the first soldier forward, the
following exchange took place:

"Private Smith, are you regular?"

"No sir, I'm a territorial sir."

"No, no, no - Did you 'go' this morning?"

"Oh no sir, I 'aven't got a pass sir."

"No private - I'm wanting to know the condition of your bowels!"

"I weren't issued wiv none of them, sir"

"You stupid man - are you constipated?"

"No sir, I'm a volunteer sir."

"You ignorant fool - don't you understand the Queen's English?"

"Oh! Is she really sir?"

"Bloody hell man - what I need to know is have you had a ****?"

"Well actually I didn't like to say sir, but I thought it was you
sir."


Harry came in from playing with his friends in the garden.
"Jimmy wants to know -what is it called when someone sleeps on top of
someone else?"
Gran, who is cooking, coolly replies "It is called sexual intercourse"
Harry goes out satisfied and Gran is pleased with her sang froide.
Half an hour later, Harry comes back in.
"Jimmy's mother says the phrase is 'bunk beds' - and she wants a word
with you"

Flop
 




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